A Box of Hair

I know that most families have a story like this: kid gets curious with scissors, kid cuts own hair, tears happen and years later, everyone laughs about it. I have a sibling who did it (twice... yes, same sibling). It's nothing new but as a parent, it's still surprising when YOUR kid does it. I wasn't prepared for it. (I mean, isn't that the motto for MOST of parenting though? "I wasn't prepared for it.") But this really caught me off guard. Here's how it went down. 

 Lucy has VERY thick hair. Long, flowing, golden hair. It's gorgeous. I know I'm biased because she's mine but it truly is something of fairytails (see what I did there?) *wink* 

Sometime today (No, I don't know when because I am working from home and we are having a virtual school day due to inclement weather so there were long stretches of time where I was in the guest room working and the girls were left to themselves but if I had to guess, I'd bet it was while Ester was on zoom for class.) ANYWAY, Sometime today, Lu cut her own hair. She didn't cut all of it, just chunks here and there. I didn't even notice until this evening when I went to braid it before bed. I first noticed one short strand in the front, then I started to look, like REALLY look and I saw short strands in several places. 

 I had a choice and a split second to make it. How was I going to react? I wanted to cry and burst into laughter all at the same time, but I didn't. By some miracle of God, I didn't. Hmm... now that I think about it, probably because I had a practice round on my own sibling who chopped off their hair and I DID NOT react with even an ounce of grace. 

 But with Lu, I thought "What message do I want to send to her right now?" Because whether we mean to or not, how we react to something superficial like this DOES send a message. 

So I asked calmly, "Lu, why is some of your hair short?" Silence. Me again, calmly, "Lu, did you cut your hair today?" She quietly says, "Yes." 

She then shows me a box where she put it and I realize at that moment that it's WAY more hair than I thought. She continues, "I wanted to give it to girls who don't have hair so boys won't make fun of them. I have a lot of hair so I thought I could give them just some of it. I put it in this box so you can send it to them." 

I wasn’t prepared for that answer. I was preparing to “practice what I preach” about looks not mattering when my kid wanted her hair different. I was preparing myself to talk about a lot of things, but not this. 

I pause. I am amazed at her sweet heart. I hug her and tell her that she has a heart of gold. I start to ask questions about these girls that are being made fun of and she said it was from a video I showed her... I don't remember showing her any video anytime recently. I remember when she said she wanted to donate her hair  (and did at age 5), showing her a video of another little girl who donated her hair so that she would know what to expect and be able to understand what she was requesting... and I think I've shown the girls videos of other people shaving their heads in support of family members for cancer, but whatever video about boys making fun of girls? It's not ringing a bell. 

Truth is, that part doesn't matter. I squeezed her tight and told her that I was so proud of her for thinking of others and coming up with ways to help. We went on to talk about the logistics of donating hair, reminding her that it has to be put in a braid or ponytail and that it's best to leave that part up to the professionals. She looked in the mirror and shrugged, "Well, I think it's cute." I told her I agreed. She said, "Mom, all hair is beautiful. It doesn't even matter." 

And then I did cry. Proud big tears. And I laughed a little (at myself), too.

Above: The box of hair and below it, a picture of a proud and kind-hearted Lucy. 

In case you are curious, we will go to a salon to have the remaining long pieces cut in a way that can be donated.